By Jack Brittle, Local Journalism Initiative Reporter
On August 28, the Burlington Public Library hosted a virtual author talk with author and organizational psychologist Dr. Tasha Eurich about her new book Shatterproof: How to Thrive in a World of Constant Chaos (And Why Resilience Alone Isn’t Enough).
The talk, hosted by Brandon Adler, was made available through the Library Speakers Consortium (LSC). According to Adler, the LSC is “ a partnership of more than 500 library systems across the U.S., Canada, and New Zealand, with the goal of making author talks more accessible to communities of all sizes.”
Eurich is a New York Times best-selling author as well as a self-awareness coach and communication expert. Her latest TEDx talk has been viewed over 10 million times. Shatterproof is the latest of three books that Eurich has written, and aims to teach readers the best ways to get through adverse situations. The book draws on both scientific research and her own personal experiences.
During the talk, Eurich gave out a QR code that viewers could scan to participate in a poll on Slido, asking viewers to describe how their life is currently going in one word.
“If any of these words are negative, if they are even sort of neutral, but a little bit anxiety-provoking, I want to tell you that you’re not alone,” Eurich said. She referenced a study by the American Psychological Association, which said that 75% of people are more stressed now than they were a year ago.
Some of the words submitted were: busy, exhausting, good, fragile, overwhelming, stressful, hectic, juggling, and weird.
Eurich explained the difference in reactions when we hear about someone else’s struggles compared to our own.
“We have this little voice in our head that’s almost taunting us and suggesting that maybe we’re not trying hard enough,” Eurich said. “Maybe we’re not sitting long enough on the yoga mat. We might be thinking, ‘Well, I’ve had it worse before. Why can’t I handle this?’ or ‘Other people have real problems. What am I whining about? Why can’t I just suck it up and deal?’”
Eurich calls this phenomenon “grit gaslighting.”
“When we grit gaslight ourselves, it comes from a deeply ingrained belief that the only response to chaos and challenge is to power through,” Eurich said.
The findings of her study made Eurich rethink the entire concept of resilience. In a series of interviews she conducted, she found that there were three distinct outcomes for people when faced with challenging life events. Respondents either became broken, bounced back, or got better.
That third group was the one that most interested her. The rest of her research was dedicated to figuring out what made these people get stronger despite adversity.
Eurich said that while the phrase “what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger” sounds good, it doesn’t hold up under scientific scrutiny.
“This claim lacks robust empirical evidence,” Eurich said. “The truth is that chronic and extreme stress doesn’t increase our resilience over time. It depletes it. And the reason [for that] is that resilience is a limited resource.”
“Everyone has a limit,” Eurich continued. “And this is something that I call our ‘resilience ceiling.’ Our resilience ceiling is the moment that we reach the upper limit of our ability to cope; it’s that second when we have no more reserves in the tank.”
Eurich eventually came to the conclusion that the secret to the success of those in the third group was that they were not pushing themselves to their resilience ceiling.“ What they were doing instead was leaning into a second skillset,” Eurich explained. “A second skillset that complements and expands on resilience. And it’s a skill that I call becoming shatterproof.”
Eurich described being shatterproof as “proactively harnessing tough moments to grow stronger, wiser, and more fulfilled. Not in spite of our cracks, but because of them.”
Shatterproof contains a four-step roadmap for becoming just that: able to grow from difficult situations rather than break. Eurich will also be releasing an interactive workbook as a companion piece to the book.
To find out more about Shatterproof and Eurich, visit https://tashaeurich.com/.
